esteem

Here are some thoughts I had/have.

How do I look?

Will he say my shirt is nice?

Will she notice my hair?

Will they realise that my belt buckle is new?

Do I really look better in jeans than in berms?

Will this/that look better styled in this/that way? x 100

Really?

But I thought... x 100

Oh I'm not that sure!

But but... x200

What if I did it this way? Compromise?

Will he/she like me more after seeing how uber-good looking I am in this tonight/today? x infinity!

Now come on.

Fess' up, how many of you are like that too? Or much much worse?

Let me give you self-esteem lesson 101.

Okay this may be copyrighted, or it may not cos it's in my own words. But for safety's sake lets just put it as they aren't originally mine as much as I wish.

Having such thoughts are never going to end, and having them doesnt necessarily mean you have a problem with self esteem.

I am going to address the area concerned with how you are perceived by others, and how it's just NOT SUCH A BIG DEAL.

Now, people, being the self-centered human beings that we are, are most concerned with how we appear to others.

We fuss over every single detail, and we want to make ourselves look the best.

This is not wrong, but with the images of beauty constantly stereotyping us whether we want it or not, sometimes we lose sight of the true meaning of beauty.

We constantly cripple our worldview of ourself to one that is less than desirable and think that we constantly are not "good looking" enough.

We may never think so in fact.

And with this comes in a constant sense of insecurity, worry, doubt and even fear.

Magnified, it could lead to a total loss of self-esteem or confidence.

Let me now make it simple for you.

PEOPLE CARE MORE ABOUT HOW THEY ARE PERCEIVED THAN HOW THEY PERCEIVE OTHERS.

Got that?

Want to read it again?

Okay let me give you a simple scenario.

Take a concert or outing for example, it doesnt even have to be at a bar or wherever.

You see someone attractive and the person is staring back at you.

Your first thoughts are:

"Is everything in place?"

(You then do a check from head to toe even though you already have 300 times)

Then:

"Does he/she like how I look?"

And the questions go on and on.

But on the other hand, the other party is thinking exactly the same thing as you are.

EXACTLY THE SAME THING!

Or pretty much.

This is an assumption for the majority of people.

Now let me open the doors for you.

The ones who make it, not only relationally but socially as well, are those who know this exact thing and are able to overcome it.

Those who do not really care about how good they look, be it they already know or they just can't care less, those are the ones who have all the confidence and drive to do what they want.

Why?

Becaused the aren't hindered by "worry" or "insecurity" or "timidness".

They are the ones who can go out and literally play the field.

Don't be so concerned about how you look, for honestly, not more than a handful of people really care.

Like 95% of people will have forgotten how you look the next day or week, so get over your fear!

If someone truly cares for you, then only his/her/their opinions should matter, and using that just follow and believe.

Eventually you'll reach a stage where you'll know well for yourself and then once the confidence and esteem is foundationalised, the world is yours to grasp.

It's funny how this is such a secret when it's kind of common sensical actually.

But honestly, how many people actually know it?

How many people can actually do it?

Why is there still such a host of commercialised programmes to reveal this simple secret?

Because people have a simple want to be assured, to be encouraged.

Yea sure, it does help from time to time now and then, but you'll only get so far. To move on to the next level and beyond, it requires a simple belief in oneself.

Faith in others and ultimately, yourself.

I see this so clearly in one of my closest friends, all the qualities I mention and I can see how he is so going to make it in the future.

Here is his secret for you, worked out simply by the observation guru 101.

Next time you go out into a community, feel good at the power you have knowing that the people you see care much too much about how they look than to give 2cents about you.

Thats basically all they're concerned with perception wise, and if you can just get over your insecurities, you'll find its so much easier to enjoy your time;

So much easier to enjoy life judgement free; in a sense.

Just believe, for afterall, who really cares?

And to those who truly care, your appearance doesn't matter.

Cheers =D

go rule the world already.