delirium -

Scene 1
It all begins with a track.

An ordinary, well maintained 400 meter running track set smack in the middle of the most prestigious military institution in the country, fitted with an illustrious grandstand and all.

It's the final round of the interval training. 4 sets of 800m in 3.10mins or below each. Having fallen well in to the timings of the earlier 3, he wants to make the last one his best.

Yet a higher level of fatigue kicks in. Not accustomed to such muscle strain, his legs feel like jelly. With each step, the responsiveness of his feet ebb further and further away, till it feels as if he's dragging two heavy wooden logs across the terrain.

His heart thumps with a pace so verile it catapaults through his entire system.

But no he's not about done, there's still 400m to the end. That's when he sees YY overtaking him on the outer lane. All before he had thought it was going to be fine keeping to his usual pace, he was in front of most of the others anyway, but things changed.

YY was the guy from his BMT company he looked down upon. He seemed frail, and had a voice barely masculine in nature. He did not really know how to be an effective leader, and came from a hard family background. Yet YY never gave up, and ever pushed himself to the limit.

Thoughts began to swarm in his head:

"Is this the best you can give? Even YY can run faster than you. So what if you're more tired than you've ever been before? Are you just going to give up again?

Are you just going to lose again?

Are you going to lose without a fight?

How many times will you lose without a fight!!!

WHy do you always keep giving up on yourself! Where's your determination? Why can't you win, just like YY?!?"

Suddenly it all becomes so clear to him.

"That's it!

I can't keep losing anymore.

I can't keep pretending to want to make up for my past stupidity for studying harder by giving up now.

I can't keep depending on my parents funding to pull me through.

There'll come a day when I won't have them anymore!!! Then who will I turn to?!?!?!

I've got to do something for myself, by myself, to prove that I'm worthy.

I'VE GOT TO START WINNING!!!!!

FREAKING KEEP PACE WITH YY!!!!!!!"

His running now takes on a new form. Though not physically, he presses himself further and further through the mental barrier, through the nails being drilled into his mind pressing him to slow down.

He pushes and pushes, till the point where his throat feels as if its got a choke hold on his neck. He never found it so difficult to breath running before. His legs feel as if they would burst at any minute.

Then he crosses the finish line.

No, he didn't win or manage to stick to YY till the end.

But he did win himself.

That's when everything started to take a new toll.